Revising Seedfolks Narratives - Part 2

Aim:
IWBAT revise and edit my Bayview Seedfolks narrative, in order to add properly capitalized and punctuated dialogue to my story.

Tasks:
1. Do Now: Review how to correctly capitalize and punctuate dialogue:

• practice capitalizing quotations: click here
• practice adding commas to quotations: click here
• practice deciding when to add quotation marks: click here
• finished early? continue practicing these activities or read silently

2. Partner Revision:

• Open a spreadsheet with the link to your teammates' narratives: click here
• Find the teammates' names from your table group. Click on the link to one of their narratives.
• Read each of your tablemates' narrative. 
• For each narrative, write at least 1 positive (Something I loved...) and 1 constructive (Something you could improve...) piece of feedback.
• Remember, you can make comments by clicking Comment in the Insert menu, or you can just click Ctrl + Alt + M.

3. Practice Correctly Writing Dialogue: 

• Open "Dialogue Practice #2" in the Writing Portfolio of your Google Drive 
• Remember these rules:
• start new paragraphs when a speaker changes
• add quotation marks before and after a character's direct words
• use a comma between the speech tag and the dialogue
• place punctuation marks (commas, periods) inside the quotation marks
• capitalize the first word of dialogue
• do not capitalize the second part of interrupted dialogue
• do not use quotation marks when describing a character’s inner thoughts

4. Revise & Edit for Dialogue:

• Find places in your narrative where you could add dialogue, in order to show, rather than tell.
• Use words besides say and said.
• For a list of over 100 synonyms for said, go to this link
• Remember, you can also add sounds or noises.
• Edit for the capitalization and punctuation rules listed in Task #3.
• Remember, each time a new character speaks, you need to begin a new paragraph (press Enter to skip to the next line and Tab to indent)

5. Continue Revising: You can never be done improving your writing. If you cannot think of how to improve your writing, try these ideas:

• vary the way you write dialogue
• Put the speaker tag ("Quiet!" moaned Mr. T) in different places. It can be in the front, in the middle, or after the dialogue. Or, speakers can be identified in a separate sentence.
• make dialogue sound more authentic
•  Reread your dialogue to make sure it sounds realistic. Ask yourself, would the character say this in real life? If not, revise the dialogue to sound more authentic.
• vary sentence length and type
• Writing becomes more interesting when authors make the sentences different lengths. Long sentences can offer a lot of information but are harder to read. Short sentences  are fast and easy to read, but using only short sentences is boring. Revise your writing so that you have a combination of shorter, medium, and longer sentences.
• You can also vary sentence structure by writing a combination of simple, compound, and complex sentences.
• add a simile, a metaphor, or personification
• A simile compares to unlike things using like or as (examples: Don't just sit there like a bump on a log. Watching the dance recital was like watching grass grow. You were brave as a lion.)
• A metaphor compares to unlike things directly (examples: I rode the roller coaster of emotions. Your love is an ocean. Her home was a prison.)
• Personification gives nonliving things human (or person)-like qualities (examples: The stars danced playfully in the moonlit sky. The wind howled. My computer throws a fit every time I try to use it.)
• add sensory details
• Writing becomes more realistic and interesting when authors make the reader feel like he/she is actually there. Add sights, sounds, smells, tastes, and feelings (sensory details) in order to add imagery to your narrative.
• add foreshadowing or suspense
• Does something bad happen in your story? If so, at the beginning of your story, hint that something bad will happen, but don't say it!
• You can add suspense by waiting until the very last moment to reveal important details and keep your reader guessing until the very end.
• change the ending to make it more memorable
• You can make your story immediately better by having a stellar ending. Maybe you reveal an unexpected twist, or you add an especially strong/memorable image or dialogue at the end. Maybe you circle back to the beginning of the story, or you force the reader to imagine exactly what occurred.
• make it funny
• Everyone likes humor, especially when it's not expected and not over-the-top. Add in funny little descriptions, events, or dialogue.
• improve your word choice
• Find boring, dull, or imprecise words and find more colorful, vibrant, and specific words to replace them. You can use your own head or a thesaurus (there's one on the side of the class website). Note, if you use a thesaurus, only use the words that you know.

6. Edit Your Writing. Check for these things:

• you have capitalized the first word of each sentence
• you have a punctuation mark at the end of each sentence
• there is a space after each period and each comma
• you have indented each paragraph using the TAB key
• you have skipped to next line when starting a new paragraph
• there are no misspelled words (no words with squiggly red line underneath)

You must finish your narrative by the end of the day!

Homework: "The Lottery"