Revising and Editing the One-Child Policy Memos

Read excerpts of our prize-winning education essays! Click here.

Aim:
1. IWBAT revise my memo that advises Deng Xiaoping whether or not China should implement the one-child policy, in order to improve the organization and sentence fluency.
2. IWBAT edit my memo, in order to improve the Capitalization, Usage/grammar, Punctuation, and Spelling.

Don't be afraid to make REAL changes to your writing.
You have to take risks to improve it!

Tasks:
1. Review the two grammar rules we have practiced this week, for subject/verb agreement with compound (more than one) subjects:

When the parts of a compound subject are joined by and, use a plural verb.

Example: Pluto and Jupiter are planets.

When the parts of a compound subject are joined by or or nor, use the verb form that agrees with the subject closest to it.

Example: Neither the cat nor the puppies have eaten yet. 

Example: Neither the puppies nor the cat has eaten yet.

2. Take your weekly skills quiz on Socrative (room number: kba).

3. Submit your one-child policy memo in a Google form.

• Open Google Drive. Click Writing Portfolio. Select One-Child Policy Memo.
• In the upper right corner, click Share.
• Under Who Has Access, click the blue link Change.
• Select Anyone with the link.
• Next to Access, select Can comment from the drop-down menu that currently says Can view.
• Click Save.
• Copy the link (or web address) to your writing project. You can right-click and select Copy, or use Ctrl + C.
• Type your name, select your homeroom, and paste the link to your writing project in the form below. You can right-click and select Paste, or use Ctrl + V.

4. Check for Organization: Track Mr. T as he demonstrates how to highlight the different parts of your writing. Then, use the key below to highlight your the parts in your own writing. The purpose of this activity is to ensure you have the each of the different parts of an effective essay structure. Any parts you do not have, you will have to add in.

• Hook/Zinger
• Thesis
• Key Point
• Evidence/Example

5. Revise for Sentence Fluency: Read through your writing and revise for sentence fluency using this checklist:

• My writing is easy to read aloud. (You should actually try reading it aloud at a low volume to find parts that are tricky to read or don't quite say what you want to say.)
• My sentences begin in different ways.
• My sentences are different lengths, and I have used different sentence structures. (Add compound and complex sentences to your writing!)
• My ideas flow easily because I have used transitions to smoothly move my reader between ideas.

6. Peer Revise: Read a teammate's writing and make comments to suggest how he/she could add details to improve the organization and sentence fluency.

• Open this spreadsheet with links to your teammates' one-child policy memos.
• Find your partner's name and click the link to his/her writing. (And click it again.)
• Your partner's one-child policy memo should open in a new tab.
• You can now read your partner's writing and make comments on it.
• To make a comment, select the part of the text that you want to comment on and click Comment under the Insert menu. You can also push CTRL + ALT + M.
• Help your partner improve his/her writing by suggesting places and ways to add details to the writing.
• It's okay to make other compliments and suggestions, but focus on adding details.
• If you finish early, help another teammate by reading and commenting on his/her writing.

7. Edit your Writing. Check for these things:

• you have capitalized the first word of each sentence
• you have a punctuation mark at the end of each sentence
• there is a space after each period and each comma
• you have indented each paragraph using the TAB key
• you have skipped to next line when starting a new paragraph
• there are no misspelled words (no words with squiggly red line underneath)

Homework: Finish revising and editing your one-child policy memo (Final Draft is due on Monday)